EA’s Night Of The Long Knives

Written 6th September 2009.

It is now several hours since EA’s Administrators and Moderators on the Sims 3 board carried out what amounted to a bloody cull.

Without any doubt, the biggest shock of the night is the life ban on the inoffensive Maddy444 – inventor of The Happy Graveyard – for writing in large font.

Yes, you read that correctly.

Lest we forget – from a certain infamous official forum thread:

"Blessed are the peacemakers - they shall be perma-banned whilst the trolls get off Scot-Free"

"Blessed are the peacemakers - they shall be perma-banned whilst the trolls get off Scot-Free"

So harass other board users, start flame wars, even encourage them, and you might get a suspension. Eventually.

Dare to say you disagree with EA, use a font that is too large (even though they are the one’s provided the larger font sizes to us in the first place), and you get perma-banned. Justice anyone?

Her last words, according to Walden95, were “Fried Pickle Juice.”

Only a few hours before she’d been joking whether anyone would miss her if she was banned. Well, now she knows. Lots.

Whilst upset about the ban, she’s not going down without a fight, however if her post at http://www.sims3rich.com is anything to go by, don’t expect EA to have a change of heart:

Note saucy girlie on couch. Cue "Sim3rich in using cheap exploitation to gain members" whinge from the usual suspects shortly

Note saucy girlie on couch. Cue "Sim3rich in using cheap exploitation to gain members" whinge from the usual suspects shortly

Next time, try using paragraphs. It helps. No one – especially an Admin in berserker mode – is going to bother reading a large wall of text.

Another day, another "Bring Back [Insert Name]" forum signature
Another day, another “Bring Back (Insert Name)” forum signature.

Also arriving in the Fields of The Fallen are Jerzi (for linking to Google), and Cashing The Fame appears about to be suspended, and with several people doing their uttermost to provoke the mods over the suspensions and bans it is likely the list will grow long into the night.

On a happier note, Peaceloveharmony appears to have survived last night’s appearence by Sims admins Leatherface, Chucky, Freddie Kruger and Jason after all – perhaps she was the only user last night not wearing a cheerleading outfit or a prom dress (you must have noticed in those movies surely)?

GrammarKing still pretending that he wasn't Simmiejunkie

GrammarKing still pretending that he wasn't Simmiejunkie

It came as no surprise to see GrammarKing’s horcrux of Simmiejunkie has been destroyed already,  especially after last night’s idiotic game of ‘chicken’ with another board user – both openly daring one another with the best ways to mass disrupt the EA board. Not so much Carlos The Jackel as Careless the Jackass.

What did come as a surprise – in a whole night of one ‘Hold The Front Page’ after another – was that the other clown got away with only a 72 hour ban for doing, if not largely the same, doing their damnest to encourage it.

To quote for the miscreant’s notice of suspension (which he has posted all over The Sims fan net yet again – does it ever occured to him or any of the others that do this that it’s another excellent way to get on the wrong side of EA), the offending text was:

“Because if you create like 10,000 posts being a big flaming monster, think of all the work the mods will need to do just to delete all of it come monday morning.”

As it is the Lord’s Day, some times mere words are not enough, and instead we need something to make us sit in silent contemplation.

So have a Jesus facepalm – this one’s on the house.

jesus facepalm

Sunshine – people have been reported to their Internet Service Providers for less. And even if you had tried this, all the mods would do is ask the admins to roll back to a saved version of the server from earlier in the day. Do you really think you were being original?

What really came as a jaw-dropper was who the GrammarKingHorcrux’s partner in crime had been – WindsorErick (and can we have a nice big Anime “Huuuuuh?” for that factoid please?).

Which translated from the Japanese, means "Huh?"

Which translated from the Japanese, means "Huh?"

No, we’re not joking. WindsorErick. The same guy that has spent an enormous amount of time drawing his Trusty Sword of Justice and Valient Shield of Fair Play against the Evil Brendan.

Ah, but this wasn’t the Sims3 equivalent of the Nazi-Soviet Pact being formed. Neither Poland – nor Sunset Valley or Riverview – faced no thread of a pincer attack from WindsorErick’s elite Spamzer Divisions and GrammarKing’s Troll-35  HoNF-Banner Guards. This was just two muppets (one thinking he was in ‘disguise’, the other pretending they didn’t realise who it really was), egging each other on to post more and more outrageous statements, all the while reporting them feverishly to EA as TOS breaches, hoping to get the other banned.

Well congratulations gentlemen, you both succeeded. Happy now?

Simmiejunkie perma-banned - for yet ANOTHER change of gender?

Simmiejunkie perma-banned - for yet ANOTHER change of gender?

The difference in punishment? Perhaps because EA keep an eye out for two accounts from the same internet address, lest one be used for trolling. Especially when one of the accounts has already received warnings. Again, did he think he was being original?

For GrammarKing, it’s the loss of a horcrux and having to revert back to his original tarnished name. For WindsorErick, the clown prince of board crimes, it’s two bans in a fortnight.  If you want to get more time to do that back-breaking load of schoolwork by getting yourself banned for good, keep going kid, you’re doing a great job.

If not, wise up. The pair of you.

Traditionally, the weekend has of course been the usual time for flame threads to start, for two simple reasons:

1. More Simmers with free time. More Simmers online. More chances of disagreements.

2. No one in charge to stop them.

This is the second weekend in a row the admins and mods have sat in – so it is quite clear now that they are pursuing a hardline crackdown on any board infractions whatsoever in order to bust users into line.

This is the price paid for one Monday morning’s “Reported Post” overflow and flame war too many. If anyone was in any doubt that they intent to remind those on the Sims3 Forum who is in charge, they certainly won’t be now.

Once again, protest forum signatures are like capital punishment – it makes you feel better, but it doesn’t bring anyone back. And it might get you perma-banned into the bargain.

In the current climate, cool heads might be better than principled stances. Leave those for Sims3 fan boards elsewhere.